Aside from getting a cute little human to have and to hold, kiss and cuddle, mommying is hard. You deal with sleepless nights, fussy babies, messy rooms, demanding schedules, etc. and you’re expected to balance life as a super mom.
For what? So you can raise good upstanding citizens and get paid in kisses (if anything at all)?
So if no one has told you this today, you’re amazing! Seriously. You work hard to balance life and a baby — all while losing yourself, sleep, and sanity in the process. I don’t think anyone can fill the shoes you have to wear every day, so I hope you cut yourself some slack and realize just how much you do and mean to the lives of those around you.
You are good at what you do. You are an amazing mom, but in case you don’t believe me, here are 10 reasons why you’re a better mom than you may think:
- You care. The fact that you care proves that parenting is an important aspect of your life and you are a better mom than you may think. People only care about things that matter to them. If you were a bad mom, this wouldn’t be the case.
- You show up. Nothing can truly prepare you for the everyday demands of parenting. However, regardless of the tasks at hand, you choose to show up for your child to meet their needs every single day. This is an incredibly selfless act that is evidence to the fact that you are a better mom than you may think.
- You put others’ needs before your own. Whether it’s sharing your food, bed, or privacy, you choose to set aside how you feel in order to give your child what he or she wants. You do it even without thinking about it because it’s what you would want if the shoe was on the other foot.
- You’re protective. Yes, you may yell. Yes, you may not let your child do things they want to do all the time, but it’s really because you are protective. Your intention is to help them be safe and to be careful — which are acts of love. One of the many reasons why you’re a good mom…even if your child may not see it or understand why today.
- You do what others aren’t willing to do. You sacrifice sleep. You sacrifice “me time.” You clean up blowouts. You meal prep, coordinate play dates, plan birthday parties, etc. It can be a lot, but you do it because it needs to be done. And you do it because you want to — because you’re a mom.
- You worry. Sure, you may feel like a helicopter mom at times the way you hover over your kids at playgrounds or cringe when they engage in risky play, but it’s because you are a better mom than you give yourself credit for being. Loving moms worry. You worry because you don’t want to see your child hurt and you have their best interest at heart.
- You work hard. You get up before everyone at times and you stay up later. You manage the home, you manage schedules, you balance work and life in between. I don’t know how you do it, but you do. You figure it out. And it’s because you work hard for the greater good, that makes you a great mom — no matter how much guilt you may feel about working (or not “working”) at times.
- You ask for help. Whether you’re asking your partner, Google, a friend group, mom circles, pediatricians, parenting experts, etc. it all counts. What makes you a better mom than you may think is the fact that you are asking for help. You want to do better and you want to know what you can do in order to do better. You ask about what you can do to get your kids on track with x, y, or z, you ask for recommendations, and you ask for physical help so you can have a break. You’re smart enough to know you don’t have to do it all on your own, and because you get the help you need from your village, you are a better mom than you may think.
- You give it all you’ve got. At the end of the day, you give it all you’ve got however much that is on any given day. Even when you don’t have much to give to yourself, you’d give your child your last because that’s how big of a heart you have.
- You want to be a good mom. Even if you are not the ideal mom that you hoped to be, the fact that you want to do better is all the more reasons why you are a better mom than you may think. Motherhood is a journey. It takes time to transition from being just a woman to being a mom. Just like your child is learning how to live in this world, you’re both new at the experience. You’re both learning how to work together to make sure you both have what you need. It’s going to take time.
Motherhood is not something we just wake up knowing how to do. It’s a personal development journey. Someone once said, “The moment a child is born, a mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never.”
Mommying is a job no one really understands what it’s like until they are in the ringer. My hope is that you show yourself some grace. You are having to figure it all out as you go (just like your child). You’re doing the best you can with what you know at this time.