My Dear Teenager,
As you grow, you know I will find anything possible to get sentimental over. (I’m still upset with the Tooth Fairy). Well, today it’s car seats. Insert eyeroll, yet hear me out.
We spend so much time in the car. When you factor in all of your, and your siblings’, activities, errands, and family road trips, we are probably in the car more often than we are at home (awake) these days.
It seems like just yesterday that Daddy and I were scouring the internet and baby books, researching the safest possible car seat for you. One that could transition easily to your stroller and back again. Basically, you’re home away from home. Man, you loved that thing. We went on a seven-hour road trip when you were about 6-months-old and you just kept yourself entertained the entire time. We spent the ride trying to sneak peeks at you, making sure you were happy and alive.
Next, we had to find the perfect convertible seat. The overwhelming topic in our parenting circles was how long to keep you rear facing, and again, so much research was spent on the best seat. You loved sitting in your own little world, flipping through books, seeing where our next adventure would take us.
By the time your knees were about to hit your face, we turned you around. You loved looking out the window, commenting on all that you saw. It was a nice change for us to be able to see you, to be able to have more conversations, and glimpse you bopping to the music in the rearview mirror.
As our family grew, we got the minivan and you found your way to the back seat. You transitioned from a high back booster, to a regular booster, to no extra seat at all. I missed you, but you loved having that space back there. It was a safe space for you to find solitude after a busy day, give in to your preteen moods, or catch naps between activities.
Then one day, you climbed into the front seat and sat next to me. I paused at first. It felt so strange. Some quick research assured me you were big enough to do this and just like that, we entered a new stage that I hadn’t given any thought to. Once again, time smacked me in the face and reminded me that you were growing faster than I wanted to accept. I had to stop using the car rides to try to take “me time” to catch up on audiobooks or have some time to collect my thoughts. I had to readjust my mirrors. I had to readjust my perspective.
As with everything, sometimes it’s the smallest things that bring about the biggest shift. For me, when you moved to the front seat, the magic happened.
I went from taxi driver to confidant. All of a sudden I was getting snippets of your day that I wouldn’t have before. I got insight into what music you prefer, as you took charge of the radio.
I also started getting some of the more important questions and discussions. Without having to be face to face, it’s easier to have those essential, but awkward conversations. Things come up more naturally and we can quickly flow from music, to politics, to peer issues, to insecurities, back to sports, to music.
I learn so much more about the young adult you are becoming.
In your teenage world, sometimes these car rides are the only time we get to chat before you are off to sports, schoolwork, hanging with friends, or wearing headphones taking time to yourself. Even when you are napping, reading, moody, I still prefer having you there in the front seat next to me.
In a few short years we will be swapping seats. You will learn to drive and I will be too busy gripping the dashboard in terror to have a normal conversation. Honestly, I’m just not going to go there right now.
But, if the past years with you tell me anything, it’s that as time marches flies on, there are always new experiences and changes to appreciate.
