It’s been A DAY. No one got along. Dinner came out of a can. The biggest dog let the River Nile loose on the floor before I could get the back door open for him to potty. A client canceled and another was rude…but here I am. I survived…
Maybe the baby was fussy and the toddler wouldn’t nap, so you walked around in dirty PJs all day, your only escape being a drive to get a fountain drink from a drive thru and a moment’s peace where at least everyone was strapped in a carseat and not touching you. Maybe it was nice enough outside that you could push the stroller for a block or two, silently praying the sunglasses and hat pulled low hide the fact you haven’t slept because the kids aren’t sleeping.
You don’t know how you can repeat this for infinity or until you go back to work…
Maybe you got sick and plopped everyone in front of the TV all day in between trips to the bathroom and to the couch. It was an all around awful day, but here you are, feeling somewhat more normal the next day…
Maybe a friend or a family member got some devastating news and your heart is breaking for them. Maybe your relationship is crumbling or your marriage is heading for divorce. Maybe you lost someone, and the waves of grief roll over you with such force you wonder if this is going to be what does you in too. Your eyes are swollen from tears and normalcy seems impossible. You’re tired of being the strong one and can barely keep yourself together, let alone parent your kids…
Maybe it’s day five of rain and the kids are out of school and everyone is bored and you’ve yelled “I’m allowed to pee alone,” and “I need you to get your finger out of the dog’s eyeball,” before 9am. You’re feeling guilty because you aren’t having the picture-perfect outings you see acquaintances post on social media and you wonder if you’re doing this whole mom thing the right way. You cannot possibly spend one more day cooped up inside like this, but going somewhere every day isn’t feasible either…
Maybe work is just awful. Your boss doesn’t get it and your clients are mad. You feel caught between who you are now and who you used to be. You dread the office and you dread the meetings because lately things just aren’t going well. You close the bathroom door and breathe deeply trying not to cry or to look unprofessional when your heart just isn’t in it anymore…
Maybe there’s no money or too little money. Maybe you’re tired of stretching the budget and going without and trying to pay a mountain of bills with a hill’s worth of income. The stress seems unbearable and all consuming…
We joke a lot about survival.
We say that we survived this thing or that thing, sometimes downplaying our own resistance in the process. And yet, the term is so broad and sweeping. Sometimes “survival mode” means we got through an annoying day. Sometimes it means we quite literally survived a gut wrenching time and came out on the other side. But even in our darkest and worst times we made it through.
Mamas (and women in general) are some of, if not the toughest people I know. Each day we get up and we do the things required of us. We balance a mental load and a tangible work load and you know what? We live to tell the tale. I have been through some hard times, everyone has — times that nearly broke me and absolutely devastated me, but I put one foot in front of the other and survived each day one by one as they came, however impossible seemed in that moment.
