I recently saw a reel on Instagram of what appeared to be a mom who got a phone call or text message from her teenage boy letting her know that he had forgotten shoes. She was videoing as she dropped the shoes off in a parking lot and as he was walking over to get them, you could see that he was wearing only socks. Why did this get my attention? Because this has happened to both of my kids multiple times.
I never thought this would be something I would have to remind my kids of, but here we are!
You would think it would be a lunch box, a computer, a folder, an important paper, or homework, but no, it’s shoes for my kids. How does one forget their shoes? Honestly, it seems completely ridiculous, but let me explain. We live about 30 minutes away from the school where I teach. My kids also used to attend the same school system. This meant that my kids had to be up extra early for drop off at two different places. This put the total commute to get myself to school on time to about 45-50 minutes on a good day. Let’s forget about the commute though and think about one’s morning routine with kids which includes: waking them up, getting dressed, brushing teeth, eating breakfast, gathering backpacks and lunch boxes, and getting yourself ready — it can be hectic and can sometimes take longer than you would like. Now, think about what time you have to wake your kids up to do all of the above. Take this and add my 45-50 minute commute to it. We had to wake up extremely EARLY. My kids would sometimes sleep in their clothes just so they could sleep a few extra minutes or I would get them dressed while they were sleeping and then carry them to my car. I would make sure they had their backpacks, lunch boxes, breakfast for the car, and that I had all of my stuff for school and off we would go.
Guess what I didn’t check for? Shoes.
Since most mornings I was carrying my kids to the car, I never really thought about shoes. My husband would even wake up and help get them in the car just so I could get on my way faster. On days they did get into the car by themselves, they were usually halfway asleep and would get in without shoes on. Even if they got into the car with shoes on, they would take them off as soon as they got in. For whatever reason, my kids tend to take off their shoes when they are going for long rides. Part of our morning routine included waking them up as I was getting off of the interstate. At that point, they would get their shoes on (when they were not forgotten at home) and eat breakfast really quickly in the car before I got to the first drop off line. It wasn’t an ideal routine but it seemed to work, all except for the shoe situation.
Let’s talk about what happened on the days we forgot shoes. The first time (yes, this has happened more than once to BOTH of my kids), I got all the way to my daughter’s daycare and as she was about to get out of the car, she realized she did not have any shoes. I just so happened to have a pair of her old, black dress shoes in the trunk of my car that I was planning to donate, which saved the day. Since it was daycare, it wasn’t really a big deal. However, when she was in pre-K, we forgot shoes again. In pre-K, it was a requirement to walk your child into school each morning. My daughter refused to get out of the car without shoes. So, I took her to the local Walmart and bought her a pair of shoes and we both got to school late that day. You would think that after this fiasco that it wouldn’t happen again. But, it did. The next time it was my son, who was in second grade, who thought his shoes were in the car, but as he was about to get out, he realized it: no shoes. I was trapped in the drop off line and didn’t really have a lot of options at that point. So he walked into school with just his socks on, which I’m sure was embarrassing, but it was also kinda funny. Luckily, a teacher was able to find him a pair in his size. This continued to happen at least once a year for several years in a row to both kids.
How did we solve this shoe problem? First, we started putting their shoes in the car the night before. That worked for a while until their shoes became too stinky. Then, we started putting them beside the door each night so we would see them as we were leaving. Although, I’m pretty sure they were still left at home even when they were right beside the door. Ultimately, we made a makeshift drop zone in our laundry room for backpacks, jackets, and shoes. We also changed our morning routine. I make my kids physically get up, get dressed, and get their own belongings together, which includes putting on their shoes. Now, basically the last thing I say to them each day before leaving for school is, “Don’t forget your shoes!”
