Parting Ways With My Christmas Perfectionist

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Parting Ways With My Christmas PerfectionistI tend to be a Christmas perfectionist. I desire to create a Christmas fantasy for my children and it gets more difficult every year! I want to give gifts with meaning, create memories that last, see all the family members, curate a wonderland in our home and have time to slowly sip cocoa while decorating sugar cookies. Of course, it must all happen when I’m still working, volunteering and attempting to cook and clean.

Clearly, it’s not possible to do all the things.

Every year, I feel the frenzy and begin to spiral into “should” and “must,” and I start feeling like I have no choice. Today, I want to push those feelings into their place and love what IS, so that I can enjoy moments as they come. It gets easier with practice.

In case you find yourself slip-sliding into demands that are too much, try centering your priorities with these questions:

  • Do I really want to do this? Am I participating because someone expects me to? It is because I feel guilty if I don’t?

  • What will the activity or gift cost? Is it worth it? Is it costing too much peace or mental energy today?

  • How can I be gentle to myself in the season of busy?

  • When I say “yes,” what am I saying “no” to? Does that reflect my true priorities? How do I determine what is important?

  • When the schedule/weather/baking/gifts/shopping/etc. aren’t the way I would like, where will I find my satisfaction? Am I letting the mood of others determine my own feelings?

This year, I’m being more intentional about enjoying the moments. So here are some things we DON’T need this holiday season:

  • You don’t need to be at every event taking place.

  • You don’t need to update your decorations to current trends.

  • You don’t need matching pajamas.

  • You don’t need a to fulfill every gift wish.

  • You don’t need to be a gourmet cook.

  • You don’t need to go onto debt to prove your worth or your love.

  • You don’t need to be perfect.

This is what you DO need:

  • You must know that social media is filtered, and let go of the comparisons.
  • You need to build margin into your season so that you can rest and be available for the joyful moments (and let the not-so-joyful ones slide).
  • You get to live your own values as you select what is important for you during the holiday season.
  • You need laughter over silly sweaters or goofy games.
  • You need to know you are the magic for your child at Christmas, and most every day.



Your children and family will remember the time you invest in them. The feeling of warmth and togetherness as you connect the hearts in your home is the beautiful gift you give that will endure through the year.

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