My husband and I attended our daughter’s preschool graduation last weekend. It was such a sweet event. I teared up as all the little graduates came shuffling down the aisle in their adorable caps and gowns, their parents, siblings and grandparents all vying for a glimpse of them. Their photos scrolled across the big screen behind the stage with adorable graduation photos of each child next to photos of them on their first day at preschool. They locked arms, swayed back and forth, and sang songs they’d been practicing for weeks. The teachers gave heartfelt speeches. But the best part came as each child received their certificate and their teacher asked them what they wanted to be when they grow up.
Many of them answered with typical occupations you’d expect to hear: doctor, engineer, fire fighter, police officer, dentist. There were some free spirits who aspired to be dancers, make-up artists, and mermaids. My daughter proudly declared she wants to be a gymnast when she grows up. There were also a peculiar amount of future paleontologists in the group. It was precious to see all these babies dreaming about their futures and declaring their dreams to their families, teachers, and friends.
As I watched this, I couldn’t help thinking about my own long journey to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. Even today, I wonder if I’ve actually finally decided once and for all, or if I will once again pivot or scrap it all and start over.
I’ve done a lot of jobs during my many years in the workforce. I’ve been a teacher, an artist, a cake decorator, a writer, a graphic designer, a children’s book illustrator, an architect, a project manager. And after trying all those things on for size, the one thing that I have learned for certain is this: what you do when you grow up is nowhere near as important as who you become in the process.
I know that so many kids are graduating from high school and college around this time of year, and they are stepping into their futures, picking majors and careers. And while that is so incredible and beautiful, it’s not the most important thing.
When I was that age, I placed so much importance on what I would major in and what career I would choose. I was so caught up in picking something, in defining myself so I’d have a clear path to success (or so I thought) that I ignored the opportunity that I should have been taking advantage of in those beautiful years which was learning who I was, what I loved, what lit me up, what made me come alive. I wish I’d just explored for a while rather than rushing to put myself into a box with a specific career path.
Because the truth is: regardless of which career I chose or which job I decided to go to every day, I still would have had to develop myself, build my confidence, find my voice, and learn to love and accept myself.
I still would have had to do the hard work of growing up and of growing into who I was meant to be. We all do. And oftentimes that process has nothing to do with your job or career. It often unfolds along with that, inside that, parallel to the skills and talents you develop for work. But it’s something else entirely.
No matter which career I chose, I would still find the most fulfillment in my family and being a mom and wife. No career or job could or will ever come close to that.
No matter which career I chose, I still would seek out community involvement for causes I believe in. I would still participate in hobbies and creative endeavors that make me happy.
Maybe some people truly are destined to choose a certain career that they can identify as early as preschool. Maybe some people’s purpose is directly linked to their career. But my hunch is that the vast majority of people could choose any number of paths and still find happiness and fulfillment. They could learn and grow into higher versions of themselves no matter their career circumstances. They could apply their own unique skills and talents to any job or career they find themselves in and make it successful.
I read a passage this week that said our work is an invitation to our higher calling. That the practical circumstances of our lives are not a distraction from fulfilling our calling, but the direct pathway to it. The every day moments that make up our work are the very opportunities that call us toward our higher selves. These moments are our opportunities to serve. And if we can meet each moment with the best that we have to offer, with full presence and without any resistance or negativity, this is our path to personal growth.
After many years of pondering purpose and career and what on earth am I even here for, I fully believe that the specific job we do in life is far less important than what we bring to the work each day. Our presence, our focus, our attention. Careers will ebb and flow, seasons will come and go, life will throw us curveballs we never saw coming. We’ll outgrow a job, discover a new passion, grow and evolve constantly.
But the foundation we build within our lives, such as our values, our priorities, our work ethic, our standards, is what will be consistent within us beneath all of that activity, beneath our daily life circumstances. And ultimately, that is what will matter the most. And then our work, in whatever form it may take, will be a beautiful expression of that.
