I’ll be honest: I’m not great at saying no. Saying yes is the easy answer; you don’t have to give an explanation of why you can’t do something.
But, the hard part of saying “yes” is that you have to make the plans, spend the money, rearrange schedules, find a dog sitter, find a babysitter, pick out an outfit, pack the car, and so on and so forth. Not every situation requires all that planning at once, but one “yes” leads to another “yes” and all of a sudden you are booked until summer 2024.
Spring sports registrations are underway. One sport practices two nights a week for one kid, but she also wants to play soccer and we don’t know what day of the week she will have practice. Another kid wants to play her tried and true softball, but also wants to try a new sport. Add in our year-long commitments of piano, horse and dance, our days are filling up quickly. Thankfully, my youngest is still too young for him to have after school activities. It’s not just the sports and extracurriculars; add in birthday parties, vacations, play dates, date nights…etc. My heart is racing just writing this.
I’ve started saying “no.” And to be completely honest with you, it makes me happy.
Not in a snarky, haha, screw your event. But rather in a, “Ah, I can breath, I can sit on my couch Saturday morning drinking my coffee in my pajamas for most of the morning.”
Don’t get me wrong; I hate saying no.
I want to spend time with you. I want to celebrate your child. I want my daughter to give a new sport a try. I want to be able to do all the things, but for my mental health I have to say no. We don’t have to sacrifice our happiness for the happiness of others. But, on the flip side, when we are told “no,” we should celebrate the boundaries we draw in our lives.
If I RSVP “no,” please know that it’s not you; it’s me. My social media may be buzzing with activities and trips and celebrations, but it’s also full of stillness and calmness on days without posts.
