About a year ago, my mom delivered, what I hope to be, the last of my childhood totes. You know the totes; overflowing with mementos from years past that you deemed “too important” to toss whilst cleaning your bedroom over the years. After a few days of walking past them in the garage, I made myself comfortable on the chilly garage floor and tore open the lid, not fully prepared for what was inside.
I grabbed a box off the top and started filing through the photos; those moments frozen in time that just take you back. I spent hours scouring through homecoming and prom photos, newspaper clippings from the “glory days” on the basketball court and softball field, and photos dating back to junior high. I found love letters, letters from friends folded in random ways that I never could figure out how to do, keychains and random items that tied back to a funny, special or embarrassing moment from my past. I came across senior superlatives and yearbooks with handwritten letters like, “Stay Cool! Cya l8tr!”
I sat there staring at these items and just smiled. All of these items, photos and memories tied me to a group of people that I was, and still am, so thankful to have had in my life.
As a middle-aged mom of three, I’ve had moments where I think of my kids and hope that they find a group of friends like I had. We weren’t the coolest people in school, we didn’t party or drink (except for that one D.A.R.E. role model, but I won’t name any names). We played sports. We toilet papered. A lot. We went sledding and played board games. We watched movies in the theater, and we hit up Applebee’s half price appetizers after 9pm more times than I can even count. We spent our days sitting beside each other in all our classes because it was a small school and at least one of them was always in my class. We spent seven days a week together non-stop at the County Fair while we took care of our animals, ate shaved ice and played countless rounds of putt-putt. One of the guys got “too old” to play putt-putt, which was quite a shame.
It had been almost a decade (maybe more) since we had all gotten together and I longed to see them all again. I sent out a dreadful group text and within a few weeks we had planned a reunion of sorts.
I can’t tell you how much my heart needed that weekend. We got to meet each other’s spouses and our kids all got to play together. We played games and laughed and joked with each other, and while so much time had passed and we had all grown and changed, it was a familiar feeling that I knew so well.
Spending a weekend with that crew made me think about my kids and the friends I hope they find along the way:
The friend who is the only boy at her birthday parties in elementary school.
The friend who they can ride around in a car all day eating ice cream and laughing at everything.
The friend who warms their heart just by being themselves.
The friend who saves them, that is, if they need saving.
The friend who is the comedic relief in all situations.
The friend who teaches them what love is.
The friend who shows them unconditional love and support.
The friend who makes them laugh.
The friend who challenges them to be a better person.
The friend who swoops in and takes them to homecoming when they get ditched.
The friend who plays board games and teaches them how to be a good loser.
The friend who may lose themselves for a little while but finds their way back to them.
The friend who loves to watch scary movies.
The friend who refuses to watch scary movies.
The friend whose spouse becomes one of their best friends.
The friends who make everyday nuances memories they cherish for years to come.
This could be a list of 20 friends or it could be found in two friends. These friends saw me at my worst and they saw me at my best. They’ve all probably seen me cry and quite possibly, have all been around when I’ve lost control of my bladder. Some were in my kindergarten class and some came around a little bit later in life. But, I am so glad to have shared so many memories and moments with my crew.
