5 Things A Good Mom Says

1. It’s OK.

You’ve had a rough morning and can’t seem to get ahead of the kids. Your hair is a mess, your coffee is cold (AGAIN), and one of the little barbarians just spilled his cheerios all over the living room he isn’t supposed to have food in. Naturally, your first response might be to grunt, yell, punish, or cry. The decisions you make in these moments of chaos not only have the power to make or break your day, but they hold valuable lessons that your child will carry with them for the rest of their lives. Sometimes, you just need to take a deep, cleansing breath (maybe several of these) and just say, “It’s OK.”

2.  I’m Sorry.

Growing up, my family was the worst at apologies. My siblings and I very rarely apologize to each other. We would do messed up stuff to each other and when it was done it was done. No need to apologize. No need to say you forgive me. If it’s over, it’s over. There was never any grudge holding or dragging things up, we just didn’t say sorry. It’s how our family works and I didn’t know any different until I met my husband. He is always so quick to say he’s sorry and make things right. He’s taught me the value of admitting that I’m wrong not just to myself, but to the person I wronged. The first time I apologized to my oldest son, I cried. He was barely 2 and was already over my moment of rashness, but I just needed him to know. It was the most difficult parenting thing I had done up until that point because I acknowledged out loud that I didn’t have my stuff together. I think it’s important for our kids to see that we’re human and it’s important for them to learn the value of reconciliation.

3. Yes.

I think we  can all agree that we need to say “Yes” to our children more often. Yes to play time, yes to snack time, yes to books, to baths, to dragon slaying, and princess dress up. I know we’re busy people and laundry needs to be washed, but before we know it, these kids of ours won’t be interested in playing with their mommies anymore. So say “yes” instead of “in a few minutes” and I promise, you won’t regret it.

4. What’s Your Favorite…

We love to ask Jonah what all of his favorite things are. It’s so fun to get to know him and hear his thoughts and watch his interests and tastes change. I write them down every now and then, but “the favorite game” is mostly just an excuse to sit down and talk to each other. It makes him feel special and it helps us get a little insight into his beautiful mind. Now that he’s older, he’s started asking us what our favorite things are. It’s adorable.

5. I Love You.

I know this probably goes without saying, but kids need to hear “I love you” about 500 times a day. (Exaggeration?) Nothing makes a kid feel safer than hearing “I love you.” Say it when you’re happy and cuddly and having a good time. Say it when your little one is sick or hurt. Say it when they just did something stupid and you’re angry. Say it when you put them in time out. Say it when they wake up in the morning and when they go to sleep at night. I know they’re just words, but for a child, it’s a constant reminder that no matter what they do or say, they are loved and they are safe.