The self-care movement hit a high point around the year 2020. Let’s be honest; we were all trapped in our houses trying to find ways to pass the time and for some people that became self-care. We all had a little more time to invest in ourselves and it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. I had a bossy toddler and a bored middle schooler during Covid, so it wasn’t our best year on record.
As the years have gone on and we are mostly back to our normal routines of life, it is often hard to find time (and money) for self-care. As moms, we usually take care of everyone else first, leaving the leftovers for ourselves. Our appointments get put on the back-burner in lieu of our children’s, our down time is really just what’s left at the end of the day after the kids have gone to bed, and the budget starts with bills and ends with the kid’s odds and ends. Last year, as my youngest hit the 3.5-year mark and started becoming a little more independent, I was able to incorporate a few simple things into my daily routine that made me feel like I was prioritizing myself in a better way.
Full disclosure: the suggestions below are very simple. I work a full-time job, am in graduate school obtaining my master’s degree, have three boys ranging from age 18 down to four (one who plays travel hockey), have friends that I love spending time with, and a husband that I actually really enjoy the company of. Needless to say, there’s not a lot of extra time or money in this season of my life.
You may already do all of these things, but if you are just surviving from day-to-day, read on to see my simple self-care tips:
#1: Make Your Bed Every Day
Why does this matter? It may not matter to you, but it matters big time to me! There’s nothing I hate more when I finally get back up to my room in the evening, ready to relax, and my bed is a mess. It makes me feel like a mess. It makes me feel unorganized and honestly, it makes me feel lazy. I have made this routine a part of my morning. When I clock the time, it really only takes me about 90 seconds (depending on how many stuffed animals are under the covers). Those 90 seconds start my day off right and more importantly, end my day peacefully when it’s time to pull the covers back and crawl into bed (with kids and said stuffed animals).
Cost: Free.
#2: Drink Your Water
My husband will laugh and roll his eyes at this one. I hate water. Loathe it, actually. I pump my system full of drinks every day and until recently, not one of them was water. I knew by the end of each day that I felt dehydrated and that my headaches were more than likely from that. So, what did I do to incorporate this self-care habit? I caved and bought a dumb Stanley. It worked. I carry that dumb thing around all day, and it forces me to drink more water. Awkward meeting? (sip, sip) Don’t know what to do with my hands in a conversation? (sip, sip) Nervous energy? (sip, sip) Avoiding schoolwork? You get the point. I still hate water, but it tastes different coming out of that dumb cup and I’ve noticed a difference in how I feel after work. I guess drinking water is really good for you even if it’s not really good.
Cost: $39 for my dumb Stanley.
#3: Wash Your Face Every Night
Why is this considered self-care? Shouldn’t this just be normal? In some seasons of life, I do believe it’s normal. When you have little ones who won’t put themselves to bed in a timely manner, then it’s not normal. When you stay up late trying to get your baby to sleep or trying to pack lunches after they’ve finally fallen asleep, all you want to do is crash into bed. Washing your face takes effort. Washing your face takes time. Washing your face could wake up that sleeping baby depending on sleeping arrangements and house layout.
The way I’ve incorporated it into my routine lately is to actually wash my face earlier in the evening. I have a really bad habit of lying down with my boys and never getting back up (at 7:30pm, thank you very much), so I have found that washing my face earlier in the evening makes it less likely for me to skip it. I also get a little boost of energy, a second wind perhaps, when I wash my face, so that helps me get through the rest of the evening before bed. You don’t have to do a full spa treatment or a 6-step system. It can be simple, but it’s definitely a way to clean the day off of you and makes for a more restful sleep. I won’t count the times I’ve woken up with mascara caked all over my face and thought to myself “this is not how I wanted to start my day.” Take the time to wash your face. It’s worth it.
Cost: I spend about $150 every 6 months on my skincare system with Dime Beauty.
#4: Find One Physical Activity That You Enjoy
Notice I didn’t say anything about working out. Exercise can be a sensitive topic for lots of women. We often feel like we don’t have enough time to do traditional workouts or make it to the gym because our days are dictated by our jobs and our kids’ schedules. I know for a while the only way I could make it to the gym was by getting up at 4:30am to go to the gym before work. I was able to sustain that for a short period of time, but I knew it wasn’t something I could do long term. I needed rest as well and five hours of sleep just wasn’t enough for me. I found hot yoga about two years ago and that changed everything for me. It became more about loving the process of the classes as opposed to losing weight or fitting into a certain size. I craved the hot room, the sweat, the mindset, and the way my body felt after the class. I am probably the most non-flexible person in the whole room, but you know what? Nobody cares. Nobody is looking at me. I’m not looking at anyone else. We are all there for the same purpose and that is to have an hour to ourselves to let stress melt away, negativity melt away, move our body to its greatest potential, and feel a sense of power upon leaving the class. What does that look like for you? Is it a neighborhood walk? Is it a class at the gym? Is it a program in the comfort of your own home? Whatever it is, it’s movement for your body and it’s enjoyment for your soul. That’s all that matters.
Cost: I pay around $100 for 12 classes (those last me varying amounts of time based on the season, how many sports the kids play, etc.)
#5: Try to Read Something You Enjoy Every Day
There are lots of things I read during the day. I read IEPs and emails at work. I read 456 Parent Square and Group Me messages throughout a school day. I read chapters and chapters of books for graduate school. The most enjoyable 10 minutes of my evening though lies in the books I read for pleasure. Sometimes, I am only able to read one chapter. Sometimes, I set up the flashlight on my phone in a weird way that allows me to still see my book with a little one sleeping soundly next to me in the dark. However I manage it, I always try to read a little something for pleasure at night. For me, it’s true crime books or mystery books of some kind. I realize that’s not everyone’s cup of tea, so find your flavor and try to read at least a few pages every day.
Cost: Free.
So, there are my simple self-care tips for busy moms on a budget. I realize they are nothing life changing, but really, I have seen some positive changes in my life since incorporating these things. As my kids get older, I hope to incorporate even more as time allows.
It’s ok to take time for yourself. I’m not away from my kids for endless amounts of time. They are still my priority, and they always come first, but I’ve learned to squeeze a few things in for myself too and I’m a better mom for it.
