I know I can’t be the only one overwhelmed by all the spending and buying that happens around the holiday season. It feels like my life has been an endless cycle of curbside pick-ups, online shopping, running from one place to the next, and eating out way more than I would care to admit. Well, this year has overwhelmed me to a point where I have decided I want to make a change.
My resolution for this new year is to consume less overall and refocus on what really matters to my mama heart.
Online Shopping
So, this all started with shoes. This pair of boots I have been eyeballing for months went on super sale and I mean like 2005 Black Friday level cheap. I was so excited and immediately stopped what I was doing to buy them once I got the text notification, but then something funny happened. The boots were so cheap that my shipping wouldn’t be free and it would make more sense to add something to my cart than to pay for shipping, of course. I am embarrassed to admit that I spent about an hour perusing online desperately trying to find something that I wanted to buy that would be expensive enough to get me free shipping, but not so much more that I would feel guilty about the purchase. What used to be a fun and exciting experience (shoe shopping), was suddenly stressful and pretty much eating more time than I would have spent just driving somewhere to buy these boots.
This experience made me realize that this is actually how a lot of my online shopping experiences go. Instead of running to the store for a gallon of milk, I Instacart $35 worth of groceries to have the gallon of milk delivered to me because I am “too busy” to run to Kroger. Instead of planning ahead for birthday gifts, I wait until two days before and panic buy a gift on Amazon, then stress about whether it will arrive on time and order a back-up gift for curbside pick-up just in case. Instead of just ordering the garbage bags I need from Target, I order garbage bags, toilet paper, hand soap, and a random box of Kleenex to qualify for the buy $50 get $10 deals.
Every single time, I spend more time and more money than I needed or truly wanted to — something has fundamentally changed. So, this year will be different. In an effort to pass on better spending and time management skills to my children and to eliminate some stress in my life, I am kicking online shopping to the curb (at least for January). With all my Christmas shopping done, I have already begun this practice by deleting all of the shopping apps from my phone (yes, even Amazon). I know this is a bit extreme and I am sure some of them might come back after January, but my brain needs a breather.
This Time Magazine article shares an interesting perspective: “Going shopping used to be known as ‘retail therapy.’ Indeed, research has shown that traditional brick-and-mortar shopping can ease sadness, at least temporarily, and give people a sense of control. Online shopping, however, is often overwhelming for your brain. Both shopping and the internet can be addictive, and combining them creates a dopamine rush…”
No/Low-Spend January
Since the shopping apps are going away, I figured this is also a great time to kick my iced coffee problem as well. Let me start by saying that I am not anti-treat; I am, in fact, quite the treat aficionado, but I am doing this in an effort to be more intentional with where and when I buy my treats. In January my goals are:
- No drive-thrus
- No spending money at non-local/family-owned establishments (with the exception of groceries, which I will buy locally when possible)
- Only buying essentials (think toilet paper, toothpaste, shampoo, groceries, etc.)
- One dinner out in January
- One coffee date at a local coffee shop
The point of these goals is not to prove a point or to challenge myself, but to remind myself of what I truly care about. My grandma used to say “We vote with our dollars.” I want my dollars to go to supporting my local shops (we are fortunate to have plenty of them in cozy little Maryville and the surrounding areas). I also want to kick my need for instant gratification through these practices. Once January is over, I will re-evaluate and see if I feel like making this a long-term change, but if not, my goal for the year will be to practice one no/low-spend week per month.
Meals At Home
Once upon a time, when I had one breastfed newborn, I LOVED meal prepping. It was a huge time-saver, it was financially wise, and it was even a creative outlet for me. I would strap my baby in the carrier and happily pack my husband’s and my meals for the week — it brought me so much joy. Now, in my home, there are two snack goblins who demand popcorn, yogurt, and grapes through all hours of the day. I cannot step foot in my kitchen without being shaken down for “just one snacky mommy, pweeeeez.” This, and normal everyday motherhood exhaustion that comes with raising two kiddos under five, have led to me avoiding my kitchen to cook for more than 30 minutes at a time.
I was describing this situation to a friend recently and she said the sweetest, simplest, most genius thing: “Just sit them on the counter and make them a part of the experience.” I chuckled and before I could make an excuse, she implored me to just try. So, I did. I sat those babies in the kitchen and just had them watch. They were so content and oddly quiet watching me move around the kitchen. It got me thinking: if I could include them in a meal prep day once a week, I bet we could eliminate the obnoxious grabbing-a-quick-bite-on-the-go habit we’ve picked up this year. So, I will be doing exactly that and as a part of my no/low-spend January, we will be eating exclusively at home (with the exception of our two special outings).
Maybe you read this and are feeling guilty because eating out keeps your family afloat during this busy season or online shopping is the only way you get to spend time with your kiddos because it eliminates the need for you to run errands. If so, please don’t. There is no judgment here, and only you know your family’s needs. This post is truthfully mostly accountability for me and maybe a little inspiration for you to join me in one or all of these practices.
