I’m Sick and Tired of Moms Hating on Moms

This seems to be a theme for me right now since I recently wrote this post saying don’t judge me, I’m doing the best I can. It just seems like so much of what goes on in life, and now especially on the internet, is judging and bashing other moms. I don’t know why we do it. I’m guilty of it, too. Maybe it’s to make ourselves feel better, but whatever the reason, it’s gotten out of control.

Since when did we think it was okay to bash another mom for whatever we might see differently, like how she dresses her kids? If a mom says one little thing about having to buy so many school supplies because she has several children, someone lays into her for not thinking about that before she procreated so many human beings. And then there’s the work-at-home vs. stay-at-home mom thing that can be a war in and of itself. 

There’s been a post circulating about moms with one kid taking the big grocery cart. Moms who have several children are complaining about moms with one kid who take the bigger carts. {Here’s the post and here’s the rebuttal from a mom of one kid. Spoiler alert — I side with the mom from Houston who wrote the rebuttal, respectfully.} It seems that moms can find any reason to pick on another mom. No category is too big (hello vaccinations) or too small (shopping carts, really??) to withstand mom judging. Have an opinion, share it with the world on your social media accounts and let everyone know how you feel — no apologies needed. That is the world we live in these days. And it’s sickening to me to see battle after battle among moms. 

We work hard. We love our kids. We do our best. Is it important to have open dialogues? Of course! We all have areas to learn or improve or grow, and sometimes it’s just those other moms in our lives who can help us see that maybe there is another way. But it doesn’t have to be ugly. It’s not okay to be hateful. As the Black Eyed Peas said, “Where is the love?” 

What I want to say is :: you do what’s best for your family and I’ll do what’s best for mine. 

Do you need to work or enjoy working? Good! Do that. Did you always want to be a stay-at-home mom? Glad your dreams came true. You home school and your neighbor sends her kids to public school. Great — don’t pick on someone else for their choices. 

We recently had an open dialogue among the Knoxville Moms Blog contributors about the very same shopping cart issue I referenced above. Some of the contributors totally agree that single kid moms shouldn’t take the big cart, while others jumped in saying “yes, it’s okay.” This was a great conversation. Not because people all agreed — in fact, a lot of us disagreed with each other. But we stayed respectful. We voiced our opinions in a way that didn’t tear another mom down. I want to see more of that. 

I love social media and the positive effects it can have on the world. I get so discouraged when I pull up my Facebook and it’s someone firing against someone else. Do you ever read comments on blog posts? Why do people think some of those things are okay to say? I’m tired of the negativity and the bringing others down. I want to see us use social media for good — to connect, to love better, to encourage each other. Let’s stop being mean moms and start following the golden rule. And as I say all of this I’m talking just as much to myself as I am to anyone reading this. Let’s make a difference for the better in this world. If not for ourselves, then for our kids.